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Source: Google.com.pk
Brace
Yourselves, Programming Jokes Are Coming
Programming
is a very tough job, I’ve done it and even though it’s a very challenging thing
to do, you can’t just stay calm and composed every day. It is a highly
stressful job, partly because of the client/boss requirements, and most of it
is because of simple things we tend to forget…like a semicolon. For now, wipe
away your worries and laugh merrily with this compilation of programming jokes,
comics, anecdotes, and videos just for you!
Brace
yourselves, programming jokes are coming. Even Eddard Stark says so!
Anecdotes
The
following are short jokes about programming, all taken from reddit (because I
freaking love that place). I’ve chosen the best jokes for you, if you want to
read more just follow the link
An
engineer, a manager, and a programmer are riding in a car. They come to a hill
and their brakes fail. After careening down the hill and finally coming to a
stop they get out to decide what to do. The manager says “We need to have a
meeting to form a committee to see what we should do next!” The engineer says,
“Screw that! Give me a pocket knife and some duck tape and I’ll have us going
in no time!” The programmer looks at them both and says, “Lets push it back to
the top and see if it does it again.”
An
int, a char and a string walk into a bar and order some drinks. A short while
later, the int and char start hitting on the waitress who gets very
uncomfortable and walks away. The string walks up to the waitress and says
“You’ll have to forgive them, they’re primitive types.”
A
programmer’s wife sends him to the grocery store with the instructions, “get a
loaf of bread, and if they have eggs, get a dozen.” He comes home with a dozen
loaf of bread and tells her, “they had eggs.”
God
summons the devil and jesus, and he challenges them to a programming contest.
God gives them the spec and they begin. Jesus and the devil write their code
furiously. As the contest reaches the end, the power suddenly goes out for a
moment, both of their monitors go blank, and reboot when the power comes back
on. God asks to see the two programs. The Devil says that he had a good
program, but he lost it when the power was out. Jesus had no such problem, and
won the contest, because Jesus saves.
A
man was crossing a road one day when a frog called out to him and said, “If you
kiss me, I’ll turn into a beautiful princess.” He bent over, picked up the
frog, and put it in his pocket.
The
frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful
princess, I will tell everyone how smart and brave you are and how you are my
hero.” The man took the frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it
to his pocket.
The
frog spoke up again and said, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a beautiful
princess, I will be your loving companion for an entire week.” The man took the
frog out of his pocket, smiled at it, and returned it to his pocket.
The
frog then cried out, “If you kiss me and turn me back into a princess, I’ll
stay with you for a year and do ANYTHING you want.” Again the man took the frog
out, smiled at it, and put it back into his pocket.
Finally,
the frog asked, “What is the matter? I’ve told you I’m a beautiful princess,
that I’ll stay with you for a year and do anything you want. Why won’t you kiss
me?”
The
man said, “Look, I’m a computer programmer. I don’t have time for a girlfriend,
but a talking frog is cool.”
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